Spend or Save?


Spend or save? This is a question I've been battling with over the past year or so. As I'm getting older my goals and the things I want out of life are changing. I'm starting to want - dare I say it - *adult* things; to move out on my own and have an amazing career I love and eventually start a family of my own. Yet I still feel pulled back and forth by this question all the time.

Do I want to go out with my friends a lot? Yes. Do I want to have money ready to move out in the near future? Yes. Do I want to go on amazing holidays or travel to new places? Yes. Do I want to save for an amazing wedding when I am A LOT older? Yes.


Over the past year I've probably been spending more than I have been saving and I don't regret it one bit. I've been on lovely holidays, out for meals, seen my friends and spent more time with my family. I've been a bit more spontaneous this year, with the help of my friend Katie, booking events I would never normally think of going to. I've been pushed out of my comfort zone and although I've been hesitant to spend money on things I wasn't sure I'd like, it paid off and they've been some of the best days I've had recently.

Of course I feel genuinely grateful that I am able to have the opportunity to do these things and will cherish these moments forever. However I can't stop thinking about the future; what will it look like if I keep spending as much as I do at the moment? I can't decide between living in the moment or being cautious about what I'm doing.


I did an Instagram Poll the other week - you know I love an Insta Poll - asking the '20-somethings' of my followers whether they'd rather spend or save at this point in their lives. It was so interesting to see the results with it being around 60/40 with more votes for spend. I obviously know some of my followers and could see that those in their older 20s were voting for save and those similar ages to myself voted spend. I also asked if people felt pressured to save for 'important things' in life e.g. a wedding or a house. A lot more people voted for yes, they did feel pressured and it felt a bit better to know that a lot of us are in the same boat. We want the experiences and fun, but feel pressured to cut down on that and spending money on it to save up for other things.

So maybe the reason I'm feeling guilty for spending is because of the fact that I, along with loads of others, feel pressured to save for all that stuff we're expected to have in the future. Don't get me wrong, I want a house and family eventually, but not right now! I can't see past this year if I'm honest with you, so why should I be solely focused on saving for things I really can't visualise right now?


I'm 21 and I feel a bit guilty every time I go out with my friends, buy new clothes or looking for another holiday to go on. Obviously I am not saying I have the money to be jetting off somewhere every week or buying designer everything, I'm just spending money on the things that make me happy.

Everyone says to enjoy your young years whilst also putting that pressure to save for that house or that wedding, which one am I meant to be focusing on? Please make up your mind!


I am still saving for the future as I do know I want some things further down the line, but I'm not going to let that stop me from making memories right now. I won't be reckless with my spending but I want to experience life right now. So if those experiences mean that I'm spending a bit more than I should be, who cares? At the end of the day, I don't remember that night out as a sum of money, I remember the fun I had, who I spent it with and how it made me happy. Memories I'll never forget are my priority right now.

Holly Anastasia xx

PHOTOGRAPHY: JKG PHOTOGRAPHY


Reconnecting


I used to find myself getting lost in magazines and photos and editorials, I remember being so young and inspired by all of these images. Just thinking the fashion industry is one that I really want to be a part of.

The first time I got struck by an outfit was in a copy of Company Magazine, one of my favourite magazines back in the day. I saw this outfit and although when I look back at it now it was nothing revolutionary, however at the time I was absolutely taken aback by it. The outfit consisted of a long flowing dress which covered the top of some high knee boots, both of which were covered in black and white star print. I'm not sure why I was so blown away by it but I remember so clearly thinking 'Oh my god, I need this outfit'.


I think that copy of Company Magazine came out around 2012 and I know that I've grown and changed so much, in a lot of positive ways, but I'm also starting to feel a bit disconnected from the fashion industry. The roots of my blog were my love for fashion, and as my style has progressed I feel I've moved in a different direction with my blog. Although I love writing a bit of lifestyle and I know you guys have told me you like it too, I am just still so in love with everything fashion and want to reconnect with that passion. 


Following trends have been something I've tried to get away from; I wanted to be a leader rather than someone that just follows. However as time has gone on, I feel like in this feeling to tear away from the crown I have forgotten that sometimes it's that same crowd that can become your inspiration for your own growth.


So here is me trying out a trend, the Baker Boy hat. I did shoot this look with Jade a lot earlier than now, when the trend was at it's peak. However I've been so slow with posting, which is why this is so late! I was in Topshop looking around and saw the hats and had such an urge to try it, so I did. I kind of loved it, I felt like I was part of something even though it was just a hat.  For me it was kind of a reaffirmation that I can reconnect, try out and enjoy the trends without feeling like I've lost my own style identity.



You guys are probably thinking the Baker Boy hat trend isn't really that major, but for me it bought back that feeling that 15 year old me had when I saw the star print outfit for the first time. I love this outfit I've shot here and although it's a bit late for the beautiful weather we're having now, I thought I'd share it alongside how I'm feeling now about following the trends. Although my blog is leaning towards lifestyle at the moment, I'm looking forward to continue connecting with fashion again.

Holly Anastasia xx

STYLING: HOLLY ANASTASIA EDWARDS // PHOTOGRAPHY: JKG PHOTOGRAPHY






Unapologetically You


"Tonight is about you, tonight is about the energy in this room that we bring together. Tonight London, I want you to be yourself - be your authentic and true self. Lose all your inhibitions, be your most unapologetic you and never listen to anyone who tells you otherwise. Let's dance the night away and take tonight's feeling everywhere you go."


This was the intro Dua Lipa gave at her concert a few weeks ago. It gave me chills, filled me with excitement and inspiration all in one go. She was essentially just encouraging the audience to go crazy, to be ourselves totally freely, singing and dancing without feeling restrained or self conscious - and I fully embraced her message. It was the most fun I had had in ages, and it was so amazing to share that feeling with my friends.


When the concert was over my voice was almost non-existent from all the singing and my body was aching after dancing so much. I don't know if any of you have had the feeling after a concert of just feeling so fulfilled and exhilarated; or like you're ready to take on the world on your own? That's how Dua's show made me feel.


A few days later I was reminiscing on the concert, looking through photos and videos I'd taken on the night, and came across a video of the intro again. I couldn't help wondering: was the reason I let go of my self consciousness that night was because there was permission, or would I have let loose and been myself regardless?


Dua is only 22 years old; I am 21. Despite how much I love her and her music, her success does make me a little jealous. She has an incredible career already established at this young age, and I think one of the reasons for  her huge success so early is her personality. She seems fearless and unafraid to speak her mind or make a bold statement. Her songs come from a place of personal experience and are relatable to so many people. She puts herself out there - just herself, no sugar coating - and this is what makes her standout.


Her confidence and presence are so strong it makes me wonder at what point she knew 'this is me'. I'm not sure I've had that moment yet and I sometimes lack confidence in who I am - however this might just be because I'm too concerned with what other people think of me. I find that I often subconsciously alter myself to suit the expectations of the people around me, maybe toning myself down so they don't think I'm strange - when in reality, all these tiny aspects of my character that I'll change or hide from people are actually parts of me.

They're parts of my identity and are what shapes me as a person. As long as people aren't seeing those traits, they aren't seeing the real me: so how can I expect to be fully confident in myself as a person?


Dua's show was so inspiring for me; to see someone so young living out their dream is amazing - especially someone I look up to so much; someone who isn't afraid to be themself. The introduction to her show has had a huge impact on me and is helping me to understand what's stopping me from becoming my complete self.

Taking inspiration from her show, I will start to become my most unapologetic me.

Holly Anastasia xx

PHOTOGRAPHY: JKG PHOTOGRAPHY





That Rachel Green Skirt


How many times have I watched the whole series of Friends since it's been on Netflix? Too many times to count. How many times am I planning to watch the whole thing again? I wouldn't be able imagine a number. I am obsessed. One of the things I'm obsessed with in the series is Rachel Greens' style. She always looks so chic and wears so many interesting outfits. I've noticed when I've been watching is that she is a fan of the mini skirt and I am here for it.


I saw this skirt on ASOS and I instantly fell in love with it. It was around the time that I was watching Friends religiously. So I definitely took some inspiration from Rachels' style for this outfit.
Inspiration and influence is a funny things and I do find it strange how people do things because of what other do. I guess it is a natural thing and it happens all the time, especially in the blogging industry or celebrity culture. You see a photo of someone you admire, love what they're wearing and because they're wearing it, it gives you that little nudge to buy it.


Although I don't particularly look up to Rachel Greens' character, I do love her style and I definitely remember thinking that this is the sort of outfit she'd wear. So the thought and the influence did still run through my mind as I was buying it. It is hard to keep thinking for yourself in a world of social media, influencers and people telling you what to do, think and look like. I've found myself thinking 'do I want this because I want it, or because Kim Kardashian is wearing it?'. Most of the time it's something that I love but there's always a cheeky purchase because Kimmy K has something similar. This idea of us being influenced to do things, whether it's something we want to do or not, is probably why it's so hard sometimes to be ourselves.


I have found it fairly hard to understand what sort of person I am at times. Comparing myself to others is something I do quite a lot and it's obviously not a healthy habit. I'm trying to understand for myself that there's nothing wrong with looking up to people or buying things because your favourite celebrity is wearing it. Although I need to think for myself, learn what I like and don't. I've started to understand that what some people do or what they wear won't always suit me or my lifestyle, and that's okay. You can still be inspired by others without compromising your own loves and passions.



These influences and inspirations I have like Dua Lipa's cool girl vibes, Rachel Greens' style and even the Kardashians in general are so okay to have. However I can't get lost in their lives and neglect my own. I know this skirt is one simple thing but as you guys will know - especially if you've read my most recent blog post - that fashion represents a lot for me. I love this outfit so much and feel really 'me' in it, even if it was influenced by Rachel Green.

Holly Anastasia xx

Personal


I've always found fashion, clothes and styling so interesting because it shows so much about a person.  In the film Forrest Gump there is a moment where he says you can tell a lot about a person about their shoes,where they've come from, where they've been. He then says 'I've worn a lot of shoes'. I really believe this is so true of clothing too. Clothes tell a story, people wear a lot of clothes, a lot of shoes and all those outfits say reflect something about the person wearing them.


I do think about the journey people take to find their personal style and wonder if it's something that just falls naturally or do people work hard on it. I watched a YouTube video from one of my favourite bloggers Angelica Blick, and she was talking about her style. She said that when she was younger she just tried so many styles of clothes and different looks that by the time she was older, she already knew what she liked. She did cringe at a lot of her older looks but who doesn't!



You can see from her style that she's got so many different interests and she tries new things all the time. As a another blogger, I love seeing this variety of style as it gives me so much inspiration. However it does make me wonder what my personal style says about me.


At the moment my style is a bit mixed - as you can see from this outfit it's a bit different from what I've done before. I want my outfits to portray who I am, what I like, my personality and I do think these aspects do come through occasionally. Although most of the time I seem really confident in myself, I'm really not. This has kind of held back my style in a way, but I feel as though my style just reflects who I am in that time or stage of life. 


I'm starting to love my outfits the more I style new ones and it's amazing how much more confident I feel now compared to when I was wearing just the same things all day everyday.

Personal style says so much about a persona and I'm so glad I can see my journey through my blog. I've had absolute cringe outfits and I've had some amazing ones. It's all a journey and it's all been me. With the bad comes the good and I will accept both because I'm only moving forward.


 Even though there are so many people who tell you not to look back as it takes away from the future, I think at points you need to.
I love to see what I was wearing in the past as it reminds me of who I was as a person. I've had new experiences, bad periods of time and amazing things happen since then. All of these things reflect in my style as I'm expressing myself and that's what I love about fashion.


Holly Anastasia xx


Making Time


I have always believed that you can achieve your dreams and goals in life if you work for it. A lot of my time is spent dreaming of what the future could look like, because it's so exciting and full of possibilities. Some of my time is spent worrying about it as there is so many opportunities for failure. In the midst of all this thinking, I'm not doing much working.

Having a full time job I find it really hard to find the time to fit in the extra work I have to put into my goals. However recently I've been thinking is it that it is too hard to find time, or am I simply not trying hard enough to do so.


My full time job requires me to have good time keeping and I am good at this when I'm at work. Although it seems as soon as I leave work those time keeping skills just fly out of the window. I'm making time for unnecessary things like being on Instagram for hours, despite everyone knowing that no matter how many times you refresh per second nothing will have really changed...


Refocusing and using my dream as a vision and a plan is something I need to do often. Thinking 'how much do I want this', 'what do I have to do to get it' and 'what will it look like when I achieve it'. These thoughts have always spurred me on to focus and achieve, they will do more so when I start a pattern and think like this more often. I have always been one for wavering confidence but when I start to think positively and focus on what I want, I've always found that I start to believe in myself more. 



 From now on I will be making time to work for my dreams, rather than trying to find it. I'll try to stop worry and dreaming about the future and use that time to make it my own. Resorting back to my belief that you can achieve anything if you work for it, I will be working for it.

If anyone has any tips on how they manage their time when they have a million things to do, let me know in the comments!

Holly Anastasia xx




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